What No One Tells You About Starting a Blog
The behind-the-scenes of The Cozy Urbanite and its launch!
“It is time…”
Rafiki knew what he was talking about when he said those exact lines.
And yes, I 100% trust a fictional mandrill out of a Disney movie – the greatest one of all time might I add…
Fight me about it.
Now, something about me that I haven’t shared with you is how I got to the point of starting a blog and how long it took for me to finally sit in front of my computer screen, stare at a blank Word document, and start typing something out. So buckle up kids! We’re going for a ride.
Where It All Started
This all dates back to my first year of master’s (I have a Bachelor of Architecture and a Master of Architecture).
We had just come out of fall term final critiques – crit(s) for short – and let me tell you, this crit must have been one of, if not THE worst, crit I’ve ever had.
My work hadn’t gotten torn apart. It hadn’t gotten criticized. Praised. Or anything, really. I got nothing! In the four years I had been doing crits, I had never gotten NOTHING out of a panel… It was awful!
And I *insert dramatic pause* was devastated. Truly! I was.
But all dramatics aside (which you’ll soon realize I am), I never had great confidence while in design school, and, to this day, I still sometimes struggle with it. But in that moment, I genuinely doubted every decision throughout post-secondary school I’d ever made and doubted my decision to go to design school all together.
Cue The Meltdown
Once I got home, in true Sandra fashion, y’all… I had a meltdown, and it wasn’t cute.
At this point I know some of you are asking yourself “ok when is she going to get to the part where she talks about starting the blog”.
To that I say: I’m getting there. Good things come to cozy urbanites who wait.
I had started asking myself a million questions; questions like why I wanted to become an Architect. Truthfully… I didn’t really have an answer. And after what had felt like hours of panicking, I really started to ask myself WHY I went into architecture.
Was it was to prove a point to my parents? Was it because it seemed like a good career path? Or was it just because everyone I knew was going to university and we were all in this same boat of “Oh, I guess I need a degree now”?
I honestly didn’t know. Which is terrifying after having sank nearly 50k and four and a half years into it.
But hey! Don’t feel bad. This story has a good ending and it turned into someone starting a blog.
On The Up
After the tears had dried and the brain fog had gone, the follow up question I had for myself was that if I was going to finish what I started – and I was determined to do so, I needed to know what kind of architect I wanted to become.
And, admittedly, as a new wave of panic started setting in, I wish I hadn’t asked myself that question. Because once again, guess who didn’t have an answer…
That’s right! Me.
But I needed that. I needed that wave of panic to trigger a spiral of questioning, of doubt, of “I don’t knows” and “what ifs”. Because in the end, I did figure it out.
Wanting to connect with people on a deeper level of understanding, I wanted to be a relatable architect, a wholesome architect, an unapologetically me architect.
I echo that same ideology in the blogger I want to become. I want people to be able to relate to the things I write. To enjoy them. To learn from them. Have fun with them.
Before I keep going, I think it’s important to note that I did end up finishing my master’s and with a thesis I was happy with.
Now, nearing the completion of my architectural internship, I’m on this new blogging journey that, realistically, may or may not go anywhere. But here I am. Starting.
So Now What?
So with that, what they don’t tell you about starting a blog – or anything for that matter – is that you need to ask yourself what kind of person you want to be while doing that “thing”. Sure bloggers are meant to create content for their audience and not for themselves, but behind every successful blogger (and I’ve read MANY blogs at this point), is the desire to want to share a piece of themselves with their readers in some way, shape, or form.
This line of thinking applies to everything in life. You want to have kids? Great. What kind of parent do you want to be? You want to be a fitness guru? Awesome. What kind of trainer do you want to be? You want to be an architect, an engineer, a doctor, a painter, a musician, whatever it is you want to be or do, do it with purpose in a way that’s truly you.
The issue? Actually starting… I’ve been contemplating starting a blog for YEARS and I’m just now pulling the trigger.
Starting Is Hard!
According to this article, there are five reasons why:
- No one likes change. I boast being ok with change and I’m full of shit. I hate it, you hate it, your mom hates it, your dog hates it, everyone hates it. People delay change as long as possible because we’re creatures of habit.
- FAILING! The spooky word no one wants to hear. No one wants to feel like a failure. No one wants to fail and the easiest way to avoid failure is to what? Not do anything and to especially not start anything new and unknown.
- Now, what’s worse than failing? Looking silly. We care too much about what people think and we don’t want to look stupid when doing something. I. Hated. Gym class. Why? Because I was always worried that I looked like an idiot throwing the ball like I had just lost all strength in my upper arm.
- We tell ourselves we don’t have the resources. Whether it be money, support, approval, whatever. It’s always “well maybe once I have more money or a better this and a better that”.
- Last but certainly not least, life… Life gets in the way and many people see it as the biggest obstacle. “We’re busy”, “we have things to do”, “I have kids so I don’t have time”.
Guess what? There will always be something in the way.
Always.
You will never feel like you’re “ready”. You will never feel like you’re 100% confident to just grab life by the balls and do whatever your inner bad ass wants to do. There will always, even if it’s a tiny sliver, be an inkling of doubt in everything you do. But you know what?
That’s ok. And that’s normal.
So, if there’s something out there that you’re too afraid to try because you’re scared of change, scared to fail, scared to look silly, doubt you have the resources, or feel like you’ll never find the time…
Well, read the first line of this post again…
And just start.
xo
